Parenthood

Today is January 9, 2012. What an amazing day. You see, forty years ago, Kathy and I headed to the hospital because contractions were beginning. We were at full term for the delivery of our first baby.
Since it was our first we did not know what to expect. Sure we had listened to the wisdom of our parents and friends, We were told what to expect from our doctor. We had attended Lamaze training. This is where you are taught to breath the right way. The men were instructed how to comfort and support our wives.
Nothing could prepare us fully for what was ahead. It was not the same as today. Today we could be calling important loved ones from our cell phone while on the way to the hospital. That is not the way it was. We called our doctor's office and explained where Kathy was at with her contractions. When it was appropriate, they instructed us to head to the hospital. Once we had called Louise, Kathy's mom, and started driving, we were alone until we pulled up to the emergency door at the hospital.
Once we were at the hospital, the contractions continued. There would be periods of quiet for Kathy, put then here would come another contraction. It tore me apart as she contorted with obvious pain during each contraction. The hardest part for me was realizing the contractions were not getting closer together as we had expected they would be doing. So, time extended into hours and the contractions were staying about the same. It was clear to me that Kathy was really getting exhausted. The nurses tried to convince us to employ the techniques we had learned at Lamaze. Kathy and I did not do so great at this.
Louise would relieve me in the Labor room. There were other families in the waiting room with us. Some were only in the waiting room a brief time until they left the waiting room because the expected baby was born. A quick delivery was not to be for us and one other couple. This man and I were about the same age. They were expecting twins. They too, were expecting their first. As the hours dragged on, we talked a lot. We aspired many of the same things. We were going to be parents. We wanted the best for our expectant babies.
Some time in the middle of the night, my new friend was summoned to the labor room. It was not the same summoning that previous times the doors had opened and a family name was called. The summon had a sadness to it. It caused me to worry for my friend. And, sure enough, we learned that his twins were still. No life could be detected for either baby. They had to take the babies by C section. And sadly, they did not survive.
Kathy continued to have regular contractions. After much time, the doctor decided to induce the baby. Once this happened, the process moved forward. The contractions were stronger and closer together. When the birth was imminent, the staff shewed everyone out. It was a brief time, and the staff came to the waiting room and invited me in the delivery room. Here is a picture I will never forget. My beautiful, radiant, proud, yet exhausted, wife with an adorable baby on her bosom. Soon, the nurse gave the baby to me to hold. The bond between my darling daughter, Stephanie Lyn was formed. It was magical. No words can describe holding the life that came directly from you. The miracle of new life is special.
This experience will forever be the highlight of my own life.
The depth of despair, by contrast was witnessing the loss to my new friend and his wife. I met him briefly as he was leaving the baby viewing room. He apparently had asked to go see the babies ahead of open viewing time. Back then, there were only certain times that the public could go see the babies all lined up in their cute little beds behind a glass wall. We recognized each other with knowing in our eyes. There were no words available. We passed by each other in silence.
Stephanie continues to be the blessing to me that she was when she was first placed in my arms. Tomorrow is her 40th birthday. Happy Birthday, Stephanie. Thank you Kathy for sharing with me to allow the birth of our two precious daughters.
If you find mistakes in this post, please understand the handicap of tears in my eyes.
Proud Papa